


What's Left of Us

by Tales_of_a_Witch



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate History, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Pirate, Historical References, M/M, Pirates, inspired of of lemonismyorange's pirate au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:47:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27036670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tales_of_a_Witch/pseuds/Tales_of_a_Witch
Summary: This is a continuation of Sophie's Pirate au which you can find here. I recommend reading the comic before you start on this.Their story was far from over. Even after the six arrived back in Italy, their safe return didn't piece back together the broken aspects of their life. Less than 12 months later, with the members of Remus' crew still on trial for execution, the citizens of their province sin disarray at the return of one of the royal twins, Roman's uncontrollable urge to run away from his sheltered and caged life, and Logan and Patton forcing themselves to over come their grief as they welcome a new child into their lives, the six are suddenly thrust back into arms of the ghost plaguing them.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Sanders Sides Pirate AU](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/701254) by Lemonismyorange. 



Logan flinched as the soft roar of the town flooded his ear. It was coming to life. He glanced down the soil path that morphed into cobblestone, crawling towards the town bursting with life that encased the palace situated in the center of it all. It gleamed proudly, basking the vermillion shine of the early sunrise. He could hear Patton rummaging in their house behind him, scrambling to get ready in time to head in for work,

“Take your time, my dear.” Logan called back as his husband crashed through the door, Patton gave a timid chuckle in response.

“Apologies for taking so long.” 

Logan smiled fondly, still unable to believe how someone as cold and glacial as him could win the heart of someone so bright and full of life. He reached down to adjust Patton’s lopsided cravat before seizing his right hand and planting a firm kiss to his knuckles, causing him to flush a soft pink. It was amusing, how even after two years of marriage, that the smallest acts of affection were enough to get Patton flustered.

“Nothing to worry about my dear. Now let’s get a move on, or we’ll be late.”

The palace grounds were already hectic with activity by the time they made their way across. Though this usually wouldn’t have been of much surprise, Logan could sense an abnormally panicked air around every member of the royal staff as they rushed to their assigned area of the palace. He couldn’t grasp what the root of the frenzy was, had something occurred without his presence?

His hold on Patton’s hand tightened as they reached they’re crossroads and he planted a chaste peck against his head, “I’ll catch you some time later?”

“Of course, Love.” Patton pulled back a little, hesitant to let go. It was the timid moments like these that they ever dare to share in public. The few seconds their hold on one another’s hands would tighten before letting go, the soft kisses they traded hidden behind the castle’s marble pillars, the trace of insatiable yearning leftover in the other’s eyes when they’re forced to separate. Anything beyond that was purely theirs to indulge in. There was something more intimate and appealing about reserving more special acts of affection for one another only.

“Ti amo cara.” 

****

“Prince Roman,” 

“Logan, please. Stop addressing me like that, we’ve been acquainted for 8 years now, when will you drop the formalities?” Roman asked, greeting his friend. It was unusual for Roman to be inside this area of the garden alone. He remained sheltered beneath the shade of the castle in nothing but his casual attire despite the magnificent weather at hand. On any given day one could usually find him fencing in the courtyard or painting on the balcony obscured from his father’s watch. But never merely standing and enjoying the scenery, it bored him too quickly. This, however, escaped Logan’s attention.

“Apologies, Roman.” He said, “I couldn’t help but notice that the court was more…. frazzled, than usual. Did something happen without my knowledge?” Roman’s smile grew fractionally more sadistic.

“Oh, nothing too concerning, merely that event is underway. Another ball.” Logan resisted the urge to sink to the ground then and there. Though he understood that these social events were completely necessary when trying to remain on good terms with others, it didn’t make them any less bothersome. As royal advisor, there was always an expectation that he partake in the socializing, and he couldn’t stand the cumbersome small talk he was forced to endure with officials whose names he didn’t care to remember. If his husband were allowed a moment to dance with him then perhaps it’d be less torturous, but Patton was always occupied in the kitchens below.

“Any major provinces in attendance?”

“Denmark.” Roman grew silent suddenly, his playful smile diminished suddenly, “Logan, do you think…. my father would accept my absence at next month’s ball?” Logan grew pensive at the dramatic shift in Roman’s mood, it wasn’t often that he witnessed Roman in a less than confident or ecstatic spirit.

“Is there something the matter? I thought you were rather fond of these social events.”

“No, no, it’s nothing, it’s just tha-“

“Sir Berry-Cuore?” A servant curtly tapped Logan on the shoulder, bringing their conversation to an end. He could practically feel a Roman shrink back at the abrupt intrusion.

“Yes?” 

“A document arrived yesterday addressed to you.” She handed him a yellowed envelope of thin parchment before making her leave, anxious to get back to her assignment. Logan studied the package intently, there were several unusual details about it. It had no return address, only the words “Patton and Logan Berry-Cuare” neatly scrawled on the back. Strange, considering Patton worked as the castle’s head chef. The vermillion wax print on the front was devoid of any stamp that would often showcase the province’s symbol or cress, stoking Logan’s curiosity. He slipped his fingers beneath the frail parchment before swiftly snapping the wax seal and unfurling the envelope. It harbored two letters, one freshly inked on pristine paper and an older more deprecated one that looked as though it would crumble if handled improperly.

Dear Patton and Logan Berry-Cuare,  
We are pleased to inform you that your request for adoption has been accepted by one of the few mothers-

“Logan? You’re shaking, what’s wrong?” Roman asked, extending a hand towards him. Logan jolted back at the feeling, dropping the fistful of parchment to the floor. Frantically, he scrambled to the ground to collect the precious documents, unable to stop the tremble in his hands as he did so. Things were blurring together, Roman’s words were distant, his heart was pulsing in his ears. 

They were going to have a child. He and Patton were getting a child.

“Logan? Logan! What happened?”

“I have to go, Roman.”

“What?”

“I have to go!”

*****

Dear Patton and Logan Berry-Cuare,

I hope this letter finds you well. I’m beyond thrilled to be giving you the chance to start your family. Of all the available adopters I was presented with, you two by far struck me as the most compassionate and responsible. I’m certain you’ll make wonderful parents. I would love to meet with you as soon as possible, but unfortunately I live a ways away from the palace and would require a set time to travel and greet you. The soonest I’m available is September 25th, but if this trifles with your plans, then please write to me as soon as possible with another date. 

Sincerely,  
Emily Jones

An ephemeral moment passed in which the two remained silent, allowing their shock to dissipate before their immeasurable joy took over.

“We’re gonna be parents, love!” Patton sobbed, flinging his weight against Logan. The force sent them tumbling backwards onto the living room furniture, forcing a soft creak to release from it’s worn joints. Logan felt the soft impact on his back as they hit the cushions, he could hear Patton’s jubilant cries as he buried his face into Logan’s neck, but mentally processing it all…was absolutely beyond him.

“We’re gonna be parents….. we’re gonna have a spawn.” Logan registered, his arms locking around his loved one’s waist. Despite the nearly numbing shock paralyzing him, Logan was still overwhelmed by the joy radiating from his husband's body: vibrant and warm and beautiful just like him. They had waited so long, and Patton had wanted a child so badly. His husband pulled back suddenly, his face rosy and bright despite being covered in tears. 

“September 25,” He repeated, “We have to clear our schedules, tell king Escalus that you’ll be busy that day and ask another member of the royal court to take over, I’ll do the same down in the kitchens.” Logan could only nod in his stupor, and it was then that he realized that he’d begun crying as well. He couldn’t help but recall the agonizing nights of waiting and yearning, how emotionally diminished Patton looked every time the postal service had turned up empty at their house. There were nights where his anxiety had become too much to bear and Logan had found him collapsed on the floor of their child’s nursery, sobbing into his hands. It absolutely shattered Logan to see him like that.

“Oh my dear.” Patton reached down to tuck a stray lock of hair behind Logan’s ear, his eyes fluttering close in bliss as his husband’s hold tightens around him. Shifting his position, Logan buried his head into his husband’s collar in an effort to stifle his sobs. But they only came harder.

“I can’t wait for them, Patton.”

****

Around six months before Logan and Patton received Emily Jones’ letter, a member of the guard was sent down to the Kitchens to retrieve the head chef.

“Patton,” A voice pulled Patton out of his busied state down in the kitchens, it was comfortingly familiar despite being near demeaning, and he could decipher who it was before he even turned around. Still, Patton’s face broke out into a grin upon seeing his sister awaiting him beneath the entrance to the kitchens, her arms clasped firmly behind her and her posture tall and proud. She had a formal air to her that commanded everyone’s obedience, it would have frightened him if he wasn’t aware of her true playful nature. Stoicism was a skill his sister had dedicated herself to cultivating ever since she had her mind set on becoming captain of the royal guard. It was a way of defending herself against anyone who dare question her authority because of her gender, her height, or her femininity. That, in addition to her skill in combat and her natural ability to lead, made her one of the most elite individuals in the royal guard. But it was her eyes that gave her away; they had a jubilant twinkle to them that no hardship could smite.

“Esmeralda!” Patton abandoned his task in favor of rushing across the room and embracing her, “It’s so good to see you, dear!” His sister’s stiff posture quickly relaxed under the warmth of his hold and it didn’t take her long to return the gesture. Though they were related, it was rare for them to find a spare moment to visit one another. She squeezed back with vigor, allowing her delight to shine through,

“I’ve missed you so much, Pat. How’s Lo? Have the adoption forms come through yet?”

“Logan’s doing fine, Es. And unfortunately no, we sent the adoption forms out last week, no reply just yet. How are the boys down in the guard? Are they keeping you busy?”

“More so than I’d like to admit. I’m beyond pleased to see you’re doing well, Pat,” She said, “and as much as I wish we could chat I’m afraid I was only sent to fetch you. King Escalus requests your presence.” Anxiety spawned in Patton’s chest, and he pulled back.

“Have I done something wrong?”

“I don’t believe so. He wants you to meet him in Queen Aurora’s room.” Patton’s initial fear rapidly morphed into worry. His sister nodded, her expression softening into one of sympathy for the king. 

“He needs you, make haste.” Patton didn’t waste another second.

*****

If not for the harrowing air that ceaselessly occupied it, Aurora’s room was hauntingly exquisite. Formerly, it was an old office that Escalus would reside in to complete his political work without disturbing his wife while she slept. After Aurora’s death, it lost its purpose. And to distract himself from his growing agony and madness, Escalus chose to busy himself with hoarding every last one of Aurora’s belongings and piling them high into the abandoned room. He took care to barricade the door and hide the key from his devastated children should they want to revisit their grief. No one besides Patton knew the king frequented the room whenever his sons were out and his pent up grief grew out of control, and no one besides Patton was allowed inside with him.

Patton entered the cluttered space just as Escalus pulled the curtains back on the single window that stood in the area. The murky room flooded with mellow light, taking away from the setting’s chilling bite.

“You called your highness?” Patton addressed, mimicking his sister's respectful stance. Escalus turned and gave a smile,

“Patton, lovely to see you. You can relax, you haven’t done anything wrong.”

“I’m not worried about myself, your highness. I’m more concerned for you.”

“There’s nothing wrong my friend.” Escalus assured, “I merely want to show you something.” The king gestured for Patton to follow him through the wasteland of his wife’s belongings, to which he obeyed. It was easy to get lost in the labyrinth of possessions that filled the room, everything from drawers to shelves to closets overflowing with dresses and trinkets lined the walls of the cramped chamber, and one could spend days searching through Aurora’s belongings. Though the late queen never owned too much, everything she ever touched had found its way into the room, resulting in a vast and unique collection of antiques. 

Patton gingerly shuffled around a chest filled with scrolls before coming to stand in front of the king again. They had traveled to a surprisingly desolate corner of the room. Nothing occupied the floor besides a vanity and a square object draped in a set of ghostly curtains.

Escalus skimmed his hand over the tissue-paper fabric, his hands quickly turned ashen from the blanket of filth coating the threads. Without warning, he curled his fingers over the cusp of the sheets before yanking back with all his strength, unsheathing the object beneath. Dust billowed upwards in a chaotic dance, and when it settled, a brown cradle stood modestly in its place. 

Like everything else inhabiting the room, it was caked in a healthy layer of filth and grime. But even with how decrepit and soiled the bed was, it didn’t take away from its breathtaking craftsmanship. It was constructed from stained oak and cherry wood, it’s bars and railings were embellished with intricate designs only the most dexterous of prodigies could master. There was a certain sheen to it that made it look perpetually polished, adding to the beauty of the carvings. Patton couldn’t even begin to imagine the care and dedication involved in its creation.

“It’s beautiful.” He breathed.

“Aurora had it made when Remus and Roman were born, by a carver in the town.” The king began and Patton’s attention sharpened, “Of course, that was before we discovered she was bearing two children instead of one, and the poor man’s hard work was never put to good use. Even as children Remus and Roman were inseparable and when we attempted to put one down without the other they’d go into hysterics. Aurora insisted we have a larger cradle made for the two.” Escalus chuckled fondly, gaze resting upon his wedding band. The ache in his eyes was enough to make anyone fall to pieces, the infinite and never ending longing for someone lost to you forever; something Patton knew the king would never completely heal from. 

“King Escalus, I —“

“I want you to have it.” Escalus interrupted. Patton stiffened,

“What?” There was no chance he heard that right. Every one of the servants knew the rules set since Aurora’s death. Nothing placed in the room, ever made its way out.

“You and Logan. I heard you’re deciding to adopt, is that correct? I want you to have this cradle for the little one.”

“Your highness, you’re not thinking straight, you-“

“No, please Patton, I’m sure of this. I insist, and I’m certain Aurora would too. It’d be wasteful to let it continue collecting dust here.”

“I couldn’t possibly accept this.”

“You must.”

“But-“

“I’ve been a complete failure as a father.” The two stood in stunned silence. Patton quieted, he wanted to protest, to soothe the king's worries about his sons, but nothing came. Perhaps a part of him knew it was true, that the king’s sadness over the loss of his queen had always overcome his love for Remus and Roman in the past. Perhaps he wanted to hear the king’s sorrow as an atonement for all those nights he had found Roman tearing at his skin in pain over all he’d lost. Or the time he had discovered the livid welt Escalus had struck across Roman’s face when he was merely 12 after he had broken down for the first time and attempted to claw his way into his mother’s room.

“I let my grief get in the way of raising my boys, and it’s ruined them. You were by far a much better father to Roman than I ever could have dreamed to be, and I’m forever indebted to you for that. But if I ever want to be there for my boys again, I …… I need to start letting her go. It would truly mean the world to me if you and Logan put this cradle to good use.” Patton’s gaze fell from the King’s eyes to the crib next to him, then back again. They were starkly different from his sons’ piercing vibrant orbs, they were a soft and warm hazel brown, nothing special, but like Esmeralda, they gave him away. They gave you a glimpse into his masked agony, his exhaustion, how destroyed he was after years of loss. 

When it came to Escalus, Roman, and even Remus, Patton could always decipher whether they were truthful or not. And this time, he needed to know; was the king really willing to move on? Was he honestly ready to be better for his boys?

“Are you certain?”

Escalus nodded, with all the certainty a broken ruler could muster.


	2. Chapter Two

I don’t remember how and when my son grew up to be such a wonderful human being. But I suppose it had started shortly after my heart stopped; yes, that was the moment he was forced out of his childhood. I remember waking up outside of myself that day, scattered and unstable, staring down at my corpse. My son was screaming, my daughter’s lively brown eyes had drained of color. There was a firm tug on my arm, something was pulling me away,

“No, please,” I beg, “I have to stay here a little longer, I have to take care of them. Let me go to her.” Death’s hold was a surprisingly gentle one; it was fleeting, cold, and as tender as his voice.

Worry not, you’ll still protect them. Just in different ways. He soothed, releasing his hold on me and freeing my torn spirit. I remember rushing over to my daughter and cupping her face, desperately trying to wipe at her tears as if somehow I could force the color back into her eyes and soothe her pain. My hands passed right through her in a chilling haze. 

Patton didn’t leave my side for three days, Esmeralda was no different. It mattered not how much I pleaded with them to drink and eat, they had fallen prisoner to their grief; it trapped them in a physical torpor that I couldn’t cease. Escalus came by on the fourth day to inquire why he hadn’t seen the three of us lately, because it was the first time in 12 years that I had failed to show up to the castle ready to work with Patton and Esmeralda hitched onto my hip. I fell apart with relief when he found my two skeletal children clinging to the remnants of my body. 

I'll forever be grateful for Escalus and Aurora for watching over us. They’d sent the castle’s doctor to me everyday when my illness became severe. But it was far too late by then; not even water would stay in me anymore. 

What I remembered most about the days that followed, was the forced closure my son and daughter fabricated whenever anyone would approach. Their taut smiles and exhausted eyes slayed me. They hadn’t allowed themselves a single moment of rest or silence, as if working themselves to death would somehow force the pieces of their life back together. Patton still found time to humor the twins when they asked him to play, and work in the kitchen with Esmeralda. Escalus and Aurora would insist on them joining the family on outings, and they’d continue their resilient facade, entertaining the royal family until they were alone again.

I often feared that their agony would consume them and they’d resort to destructive tendencies to cope. So I found myself using what little was left of me to hide the alcohol bottles that Patton brought home or empty the bullets in Esmeralda’s firearms when she was left alone after training with her gun.

The memories flood my senses as I glide into the room Logan had situated for their new child. The nursery had a perpetually vacant atmosphere that tainted it. It was minimalistic; one drawer, a window adorned with violet curtains, a rocking chair, and a beautiful wooden cradle embellished with pillows and blankets. It was devoid of life, yet burned with so much potential to shelter happiness. I migrate over to the crib and graze my hand along the railing, fractions of Aurora’s presence still lingered in its pieces; the care and protection of a mother had never left. We had reunited shortly after her death, but she didn’t frequent often anymore. After all, she had her own boys to look after. 

I recall the day Logan and Patton wed as I make my way across the courtyard in search of my two children. Logan’s parents had attended; traveled all the way from England with his brother in tow as soon as they had heard the news of their son’s betrothal. Logan was the spitting image of his father; porcelain skin and curious icy blue eyes that clashed with jet black hair. His mother embraced her son the way I used to hug Esmeralda and Patton; with all the love and adoration in the world. I looked away because it was too painful.

It wasn’t difficult to locate my children despite the castle’s dizzying size; Emseralda’s joy reverberated through the entire place as Patton told her the news. She was going to be an aunt at last. It was something she had pestered her brother about ceaselessly since his marriage; she wanted it almost as badly as Patton did. I press a peck against her forehead as soon as I find them, wrapping an arm around her nape and resting my opposite hand on Patton’s shoulder. It’s not the same, but their faces soften at the touch as they always do, a meager sign that they can still acknowledge my presence. Because even after death consumed me, I can still protect them, just in different ways.

**Author's Note:**

> This initially started out á small writing excersizes to get me writing for enjoyment again, but it grew to such an extent that I wanted to publish it some how. I became a little rushed towards some areas of this chapter, and I think you can kind of tell. I'm still a little rusty but I hope to get better


End file.
